Lessons from a childhood of love and loss

Interviewer 1: What was your early life like?

Rita: Early life was very…actually the first half, I would say, was very sweet.  I was a loved and wanted child. And that's not very usual. Girls were not welcomed in my part of India in that era.  I was born after 12 years of my parents’ marriage. Additionally, in my joint family, there was only one other girl, and she was around 40 years older than me.

So when I was born, everybody was so happy.

But when I was around 10 years old, my dad  had a serious illness. So my mom and dad moved away and I was living with my uncle’s family. They were all sweet, but without my parents around, I felt like a burden on them.

On top of that, I had my younger sister to take care of, who had a strong personality, and she fought with other family members all the time. 

While I waited about two years for my parents’ return, I heard that my dad passed away.  During the same year, four other close relatives in my family died one after another.  . . And life became sad and difficult. 

In addition to emotional pain, we faced financial problems. The successful business that my uncle and dad did together, started failing. My uncle was not that educated, and without my dad, that support was gone.  Then after that, my uncle passed away, too. 

Interviewer 2: You're a very strong person. You had a lot to deal with and a lot of responsibility at a young age, but you've really built yourself up, and that's very inspiring.

Rita: Thank you, thank you. I think probably whatever comes on, you get the strength from somewhere. I think that's what I believe. I don't know, sometimes when I think about all those things, it feels very difficult. But it's past.

Interviewer 2: Are there any important values and messages you think you learned from your parents?

Rita: Yeah, I think my parents were very much into serving and paying attention to people in need. From a very early age, I watched my parents always helping and talking with respect to old people and people in need.  My dad had one sentence I thought about throughout difficult times. He said, “There are many people who are less fortunate than you. When you are dealing with difficulties, thinking about them will take you out of your pain, and it will become a little bit manageable.”

There might be more things, but it's not coming to me right away.